I’ve made it out
to the forest in spite of the frosty cold, air that points fingers
Into warm creases
and spaces filled with body heat, to steal comfort and make
Me work harder,
walk faster, quick short steps that keep the cold at bay
I tramp through
the trees, the path worn here and there by snowshoes and skis
Deep, sharp
footprints of deer hooves, some big and strong, some tiny, dainty
Prancing or
scampering tracks, mottled by shuffling
or trudging boot marks
Long streamers of
sun-shined ski dents showing the way over the glossy trail
I enjoy this stillness, the icy breeze sends
little shivers, the blue sky sits still.
I stop high on
the trail above the river, near a wooden bench, listening to the flow
Of the polar
water running beneath ice, encased in long, thin, possessive sheets
Along the edges
of the river are more deer tracks,
evidence of their frolicking
Happy, romping
marks reminding me of poetry, and “where angels dare to trod.”
I always feel the
spirits resting in the trees, I stop to put my hands on bark, rough
Satisfying, it
feels strong and durable, the essence in my life I miss most of the time
The big hands I
long to have caressing me at night are missing in my life, the stolid
Tree trunks
remind me of male muscle, strong arms holding me, I am secure, stilled
And as I lift my
gaze to the tree tops that have reached high to heaven with trust
My face is
caressed with a soft, smattering of tiny cooling drops, my skin is flushed
Then chilled,
soothed, touched. It feels like a
blessing from the gods of the forest.
Awed, I ramble
down to the river and sit so close to
the rushing current, that I can
Feel its body
moving near mine, alive, rushing, churning, flipping up twigs and logs
Limbs parting in
her streams and flowing within her grasp, she moves even the
Massive bits, and
her strength is a never-ending torrent of meaning and measure
A river always
feels like an entity to me, her heartbeat strikes mine with depth
Resonates in a
part of me few people know or understand, I trail my fingers along
The icy sides of
her near the muck of the banks and I let her essence fill me like sex
We merge as one
in female need and I envy her catch of rough bark and branch.
Ambling back up
towards the higher trail, I ascend the sloping hill in sturdy boots
Across the mounds
of the forest bottom I glimpse the flashing white tails of deer
A few of them
darting away and over the wooden rail fence, nervous of my presence
A tiny spotted
fawn stops to glance back at me, big, brown, glazed eyes curious
I smile and
traipse along, the crisp crunch of boot smacking hard-packed gritty snow.
At the edge of
the forest I stop to feel my goodbye, a last, long lingering look
Longing to stay
and merge with them, longing to take their heartbeat home.
cailin raine
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